The Caffeine Free Me

Hello, my name is Alyssa and I've been clean for 14 days.

And when I say clean, I mean that I am caffeine free. It's been a struggle. Withdrawal was ugly. I had many nights where I was laying on the floor in convulsions, foaming at the mouth. And I developed a severe twitch for a few days, which left me with a wicked case of whiplash. I was also experiencing hallucinations wherein I thought I was a giant penguin, and I kept insisting that Mike sit on Emma, our little unhatched egg.

I kid, I kid. But seriously, I did have some wicked headaches for a few days. After that, I started to feel GREAT!! Now, the thing that surprises me most is that I wasn't a caffeine junky for long before I decided to give it up for my new years resolution.

Once upon a time I was a senior in college, and was student teaching, on the track team, and taking night classes to finish the minor that Education majors don't usually finish. Ummmm so I didn't sleep. I would get up at 4:45 am to snag a shower before the other 5 girls, who were also student teaching, got up and took over the house. And then I'd drive an hour and fifteen minutes down a STRAIGHT road in the middle of nowhere to a school just west of the middle of nowhere. Then I'd teach all day, and go straight to track practice. Of course, I'd get there late, which means that I'd stay late to finish my work outs. Then I'd try to sneak in to the dining hall for dinner before it closed at seven. Then 3 nights out of the week I'd go back to the weight room to get my lifting in. The other two nights I went to class. And then I'd go home and do lesson plans and coordinate my materials. And then I'd sleep for about 3-4 hours and repeat.

SOOOOOOO the point of that whole story is that to avoid driving off the side of the road on my ENDLESS drive down a STRAIGHT road with ridiculously boring scenery, I started drinking coffee. I know...my bad, my bad. But at that point, I thought it was best for my own safety if I could actually stay awake while driving. By the time I finished student teaching, I realized I was hooked, and cut myself off completely.

And it wasn't that bad. Over the years I've enjoyed Dr. Pepper and Wild Cherry pepsi, but never drank so much soda that I felt it was affecting me, keeping me up. And then when I was pregnant, I cut out all caffeine again. And I kept it mostly cut out, except for maybe once or twice a month, while I was nursing. And then I started training for my marathon, and was barely drinking soda at all. I occassionally had about 1/2 c. of Dr. Pepper before running, because I'd read in a running magazine that consuming a small amount of caffeine before running can lead to 26% greater return on the workout. So, for a long time I really wasn't drinking that much caffeine.

And then I finished my marathons. And then I, for some reason, started DOWNING the soda. The thought in my brain was that, HEY, I can live a little because I'm not training for anything, or pregnant, or nursing. And I mean it when I say DOWNING the soda. There were some days when I would get ready for bed, and realize that I hadn't had anything to drink that day but soda. And hey, maybe I should drink some water before bed?!? I'm not even kidding a little bit, here.

So, that was me from about mid-November til December 31. Dr. Pepper McGuzzler. And by the end of those 7 or so weeks, I FELT. LIKE. CRAP. Bloaty. Headachey. Irritable (before my first cup, heh). I seriously felt like it was a drug. I would feel like crap before I had some caffeine in me, but I would feel like crap when I was drinking the stuff. Ugh.

So, it just dawned on me. I was having lunch with my friend Dani on December 31, and I downed a cup of Dr. Pepper, and then refilled my cup before we walked out the door. We stood in the parking lot talking for a couple minutes about going to the gym together, and how we both kind of felt a little off since we haven't been going to the gym as much as we usually do. And then I looked at the drink in my hand and thought, this surely isn't helping.

And that was the last caffeinated beverage I've had. I have high hopes that I'll make it stick. I've been doing pretty good in keeping out most sodas. And I am drinking A LOT more water. I am hoping to go soda free by the end of the year!!

The weird thing about this all, is that my insomnia problems have become WORSE since I've given up the caffeine! ACK! I really don't understand it.

Oh, and I'd like to report that earlier today I was ready to commit murder to get my hands on a Dr. Pepper. But I didn't. Go ahead and pat me on the back.